I'm with you and Rosaelyn, what most people think of as 'sand' is too fine for me. Anything less than 1/16" never finds it's way into any of my pots, with 1/8" being the lower limit for most things, and the smaller sizes (1/16" - 1/8") being reserved for cuttings and seedlings as Scott mentions.
However, as Tom pointed out, not all sand is created equal. Rather than concern ourselves with nomenclature, better to evaluate the material in question.
What about shohin?
Size of the plant and pot seems an important factor...
Let's not forget climate too. In my area I don't find it necessary to go down that fine for shohin sized plants. Other growers, under different circumstances, might make a different choice. I don't really do mame but my cuttings and seedlings, of a similar size, do get the finer (1/16" - 1/8") mix. At the first re-potting, sometimes even the same year, I step up to my general mix.
My old mentor grew some trees in garden soil...his watering was much different too...
Yes, our trees will grow in many mediums providing our watering habits match the circumstance. Still, I think most modern enthusiasts would agree that a more free draining medium is preferable.
Here are a few examples of what I routinely find in my pots. The first example is in an even coarser (1/4"+) mix.
Anyone who wants to learn more about the mechanics of soil composition and container culture would be well served to read these: